I often think, “If I just receive clarity from the Lord, I will gladly obey.” But in our recent journey, I’ve realized that fear can keep me from moving forward, even when God does provide clarity.
In Judges 6, we see a man named Gideon struggling with this same issue: receiving clarity, but still afraid of moving forward in his circumstances. How I can identify with Gideon!
An angel of the Lord appears to Gideon and tells him “the Lord is with you.” What more should he need than that kind of overt confirmation? Yet, Gideon questions that statement, feeling as if the Lord has abandoned him and the people of Israel.
The Lord then tells Gideon that he will be given strength to save Israel. But Gideon questions the angel of the Lord once again, and he does so by pointing out his unsuitably for the task: he’s weak, he’s young, he’s inadequate. The angel of the Lord reminds Gideon that God is with him!
I’m just like Gideon. I desire clarity…God gives me what I ask for…but then I doubt and ask for more clarity. Again and again.
Later on in Gideon’s life, the Spirit of the Lord comes upon him as he prepares the Israelites for battle. And despite God’s earlier faithfulness, Gideon once again questions Him, looking for assurance that the Lord will keep His promises to Israel.
As a way to confirm God’s will, Gideon places a wool fleece on a threshing floor, and offers a prayer. If there is dew only on the fleece and all the ground is dry, then he will know that the Lord is faithful. God graciously gives Gideon the sign he is looking for…yet Gideon continues to doubt. So he prays again, this time asking that the ground will be wet with dew and the fleece will be dry. God…ever gracious, ever patient…once again responds to Gideon’s request.
God is providing Gideon with incredible clarity about his direction, but – at almost every step - Gideon hesitates. He struggles with doubts; he offers excuses; he delays moving forward by asking questions. Why does he do this? Because he feels inadequate for the tasks ahead, even though he has been personally selected for those tasks by God Himself! Gideon is afraid. And his fear results in hesitation.
I understand exactly how Gideon feels, because God has given us tremendous clarity in recent months as we have waited upon Him. We certainly do not know all that the future holds, but He has faithfully given us clarity and direction at each step of our journey. We have learned that we do not need to understand all the steps that lie ahead…we just need to know the next step. And God has made the next step clear, time after time after time.
I love to analyze and compare and evaluate; I love to be in charge of the details of my life. So as Bruce and I prayerfully searched for a new church home, I wanted God to give us two or three or four or more options from which to choose.
But I was praying daily for clarity, so God directed us to one…and only one…church. You see, our loving Father knew that too many choices would not only muddy the water, it would cause us to think that we were in control. Instead, we had to rely on God. We had to trust His choice for us, rather than (as is usually the case) ask Him to bless the choices we make.
When we visited the church that God had picked out for us, I felt in my soul that He was confirming and clarifying His plan for us. So how did I respond? Did I react with faith and trust? Sadly…no. I responded just like Gideon, with doubts and questions and fears.
I felt inadequate. I questioned what it would be like to move to a new place with new people. Like Gideon, I wanted to ask for a re-check; to clarify if God really was speaking to us; to clarify that we actually understood His plan correctly.
Why the questioning? Why the doubts?
Fear. Just fear. I was afraid that I could not do what needed to be done; that I could not be who I needed to be.
However, as I pondered and prayed, I realized that Gideon and I both were looking at our challenges from the wrong angle. We were focusing on ourselves. We were struggling with our perceptions, our capabilities, our plans, our desires. By bringing me to the story of Gideon, God reminded me that the journey of faith is not built upon what I can do. It is about listening to God, hearing His voice, and following Him. Yes, I am weak and not always capable. But God is strong, always capable, and always faithful.
It was comforting to read Gideon’s account of his dialogue with God. For as I recognized my own fear and offered it to the Lord, His peace descended upon my heart…my mind…my soul. And I realized that it really is better not to know everything about the future. All I need to know is the next step.
All I need is clarity – just enough clarity – so that I can move forward in faith, following the Lord wherever He leads me.
- Julie
About Me
- Bruce and Julie
- After seasons of working in both the for-profit and non-profit worlds, God called both of us into ministry. We have two over-riding passions: (1) to communicate - via speaking, teaching, and writing - God's truth as found in the Bible, and (2) to help men and women experience a faith in Jesus Christ that meets the deepest needs within their souls. + + + + Both of us are ordained ministers in the independent Christian Churches. Bruce is the Preaching Minister at Garden Way Church in Eugene, Oregon. Julie has earned a certificate in Spiritual Direction, has been a Women's Pastor and an adjunct college professor, and oversees a non-profit women's ministry called "the unfolding soul". Together we are developing a prayer garden at our home in Springfield called The Lavender Pavilion. + + + + We have been married for more than 30 years and have three adult children.
