School Time & Break Time

My spring grad courses ended a few weeks ago and the fall courses are a few months away. As I approached the completion of my spring classes, I felt like singing “free, free, free at last”.

For a few months I do not need to spend most of every day sitting at a desk, studying, reading and uploading posts, and writing papers for class. But what came to mind as I considered a different rhythm for the summer? Many important and wonderful things: organizing and cleaning, fun projects, outdoor projects, and sweet time with old and new friends. I could not wait!

And yet…I knew God wasn’t directing me simply to exchange the high intensity of schoolwork with another type of high intensity activity. Instead, he was inviting me to intentionally choose a different rhythm for this season.

I believe he’s inviting me to refresh my soul.

Yet this is not easy to do, because it is so hard to slow down in our world!

Noise and rushing are common themes, regardless of our job, our responsibilities, our activities or family scenarios. Whenever we are offered time to slow down, we struggle to actually do it. We are saturated with the culture of speed and busyness, and therefore must choose whether we will allow ourselves more space in our schedules or not.

How do we make that choice? By remembering. 

In a work entitled “Song of Myself”, Walt Whitman paints an inviting picture of what it looks like to choose rest. He reminds us of the time:

…when summer was a barefoot season of ease – quite before we grew old enough to mentally convert our time into “dollars earned” or “places seen”.

Now we're caught in the adult world. It has new goals. Results – preferably visible – are what counts. Along the way, we’ve forgotten so many things.

We've forgotten that God delights in us and we can delight in Him. Our quiet time is filled with the urgency of hurried prayers or intense reading. We always have words in our mind. There is no silence. There is no time.

We've even forgotten the small things...like how to watch a butterfly. How to roll down a hill faster and faster and faster. Instead, we've learned to produce. In fact, we've learned it so well we all agree it is necessary…even if we agree reluctantly. 

What we haven't learned is how to sometimes be childlike in this adult world. We haven't learned when to forget results and goals and just marvel at being.

In these sunny months of fresh berries and sunshine here in Oregon, I want to marvel more at the joy God has in me…and with me. I want to be refreshed and renewed, so that I might see God presence more clearly, and experience his love in new ways.

My prayer is that you will, too. 

- Julie

Graduate School: A New Rhythm of Life

I haven’t posted in quite awhile because I’ve been immersed in studies. In the spring of 2014, I launched into an online graduate program at Hope International University (www.hiu.edu) in southern California. By this time next year, I will finish with an MA in Ministry & Christian Leadership.

Since earning my BA many years ago, I’ve regularly attended seminars and conferences, and have completed two certificate programs (one in Women’s Ministry and one in Spiritual Direction & Formation). However, diving back into a full-fledged academic program has been extremely challenging.

I’ve discovered that learning in the online environment requires an entirely different mindset, because you can’t see people’s faces & engage in actual conversation. However, there is one huge benefit: I can work at my own pace, which allows me some flexibility in my schedule. Nevertheless, my schooling has been consuming. Even though I’ve done ministry and Bible teaching for years, I’ve never formally studied “theology” before, so this truly is a new endeavor for me.

It’s been hard work, yet tremendously stimulating and enjoyable. And since the topics I’m studying relate directly to Bruce’s areas of knowledge and ministry, it’s been wonderful to “talk shop” with each other on an entirely new level.

Best of all: as I study…as I interact with professors and other students…as I discuss class topics with Bruce…I realize that this season is about far more than just acquiring new knowledge. God is using all that I am doing to continue His process of changing me and helping me to grow.

-       Julie

Knowing God vs. Knowing About God

I ran across a great insight from the Christian author, George MacDonald. My paraphrase of what he wrote goes like this:

Most of the teachers in the church spend more time explaining God…than obeying God. The gospel (the good news about Jesus, forgiveness, and the coming Kingdom of God) is given not to redeem our understandings, but our hearts. When that is accomplished, then – and only then – will our understandings be set free.

This point is so true…and so often overlooked. And it strikes right at the heart of who I am and what I do. 

I am not a scholar, but I am a thinker. I love to study and learn, and I love to teach. I feel as if my life is, to a great extent, an ongoing pursuit of the truth. My ministry and my calling are (among other things) to teach people the truth contained in the Bible.

And yet – if I am not careful – I can turn the pursuit of knowledge into an idol. If I am not careful, I can immerse myself in study for it’s own sake and neglect the condition of my heart and soul. If I am not careful, I can mislead our church into thinking that more knowledge is the solution to all of life’s issues.

The Bible itself reminds us to keep knowledge in its proper place:

And so, dear brothers and sisters, I plead with you to give your bodies to God because of all he has done for you. Let them be a living and holy sacrifice – the kind he will find acceptable. This is truly the way to worship him. Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God’s will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect.  [Romans 12:1-3, New Living Translation]

I’ve always appreciated this passage, because it does not ignore the importance of the mind. However, the Apostle Paul – writing under the guidance of the Holy Spirit – tells us that we must offer ourselves first. If I fail to follow this timeless advice, I may increase my knowledge without truly being transformed by God.

  

-       Bruce

A Day of Reflection

A few times a year, the monastery north of us in Mt. Angel offers a day of reflection.  It includes a few short talks from one of the nuns, and several hours of quiet time.  This past week I took a friend and we joined in.  I came away with a few new ways at looking at some of my issues and questions, along with a lighter heart and a more rested spirit.

One talk focused on preparing for the birth of Jesus during the Advent Season.  I started to think about all that this season usually entails - preparing special meals, Christmas parties, choosing gifts and decorating the house among other things.  It always is a time when I really feel that need to take control of my schedule since every minute can be busy with activity. 

But our teacher suggested a better way to prepare.

...Instead of focusing on physical preparation, focus on spiritual preparation. 

...Instead of planning every moment, be open and receptive to how God chooses to show up in my moments. 

...Instead of worrying whether I’ve checked everything off the list and put every decoration in place, be alert to God’s surprises, delays, and plans.

This certainly is the year to take this message to heart.  For many weeks, Bruce has been working on refinishing our dining/living room floor.  It’s a big job and has been much more involved and time consuming than we expected.  Our son, his fiancé, and her little boy are arriving here in two weeks, with their wedding a week later.  And we are not ready – yet. 

Some days I get anxious about the “doing”, because this is the season of doing.  The morning at Mt. Angel reminded me again to focus on God’s presence, and to be receptive to whatever He has for me each day. 

This is the way to prepare for the birth of Jesus: to joyfully experience being in the presence of Almighty God. 

Oh come let us adore Him – Christ the Lord. 

-          Julie

God’s Grace & Graciousness

A few weeks ago, I woke up feeling a bit melancholy.  Just before Bruce left for work, he prayed for me, as he often does.    In that prayer, he encouraged me to embrace God’s grace, to reflect God’s graciousness, and to be grateful for all that God has given me. 

I’ve been pondering these qualities – grace, graciousness and gratefulness – in a new way since that morning.  These thoughts are not new or profound, but they serve as reminders of the importance of keeping my mind, my heart, and my attitudes in tune with Jesus. 

Embrace God’s grace

God’s grace is offered to me as His child.  I am a sinner in need of a Lord who will receive me with unmerited favor; a Savior who will pardon my sin.  But sometimes I act as if I’m a sinner who has yet to find a Savior!  I see my sin…and I berate myself.  I groan with disappointment at my imperfections and bad attitudes, and – by doing so – I allow negative thoughts to overshadow God’s gift of grace.  

 

Psalm 32 reminds me to rejoice in the Lord and be glad.  The psalmist reminds me that I am called “righteous”…not because of what I do or don’t do, but because the very act of my confession draws me into God’s grace. 

How can I be melancholy if I embrace the reality of God’s grace? 

Reflect God’s Graciousness

My mother was one of the most gracious people I ever have met.  She showed a gracious spirit toward other people, often in the face of unkind comments or selfish behaviors.  She extended herself to care for others, even when they were difficult to deal with.  She followed Jesus’ example of love by reflecting God’s graciousness to the people around her. 

I’ve seen God extend His love and graciousness to me…and not just through people like my mom.  God has been merciful, offering me gentle indulgence when I’ve failed or have been stubborn in my response to Him.  Galatians 5:22 reminds me that I am not just a recipient of God’s graciousness…I also have the opportunity to pass His graciousness on to others.  Each day, I can choose to embrace the reality that God’s Spirit lives within me and equips me to radiate godly character and godly virtues toward the people I encounter.

Yet it’s so easy to fall short.  It’s easy to be gracious when people are loving and accepting of me.  Or when I’m in a good mood because things are going well.  But when I’m irritated or frustrated…when people don’t treat me the way I prefer to be treated…then I’m not always so gracious.  And so I recognize that the only way to consistently reflect God’s graciousness is to keep spending time with Him.  I need to dwell in His gracious presence so I can, in turn, reflect His gracious love to others. 

Gratefulness to God

Of these three qualities – grace, graciousness and gratefulness – this last one is the most difficult for me.  I don’t like to admit it, but feelings of entitlement can overshadow my thinking.  Pessimistic attitudes can loom large in my mind and emotions.  And these things then crowd out the awe…the incredible awe…of having a relationship with the God of heaven and earth.  A lack of gratefulness erodes my appreciation for who God is, for His gift of love, and for the rich and abundant life He offers me.

As I ponder this, I realize anew that gratefulness is a choice.  I always can find something to complain about or fret over.  Yet God is willing to walk with me, guide me, and love me in spite of my weaknesses.  And so there always is something for which I can be grateful. 

And above all things, I am grateful for His grace. 

-      Julie

The Absence of a "Post-Vacation Letdown"

As we pass our 2^nd anniversary here in the Willamette Valley of Oregon, I’ve been reflecting on the incredible change that has taken place in our lives.  We are in a new place, making new friends, participating in a new church, living in a house unlike anything we ever have experienced, and we are learning a new rhythm of life. 

How can anyone summarize all of this?

For me, the most succinct way to distill all of this down is captured in the title of this post:  “The Absence of a Post-Vacation Letdown’”.

Here is what I mean. 

By God’s grace, we live in a place of beauty.  It is green here all year round.  It is a place where we can work hard and be frenetic if we want…but it is a place where we easily can step back from perpetual busyness and experience peace.  And tranquility.  And silence.  We live in a country setting in the heart of town.  We can be outside of town in mere minutes.    

And it is green.  Oh, so green.

We have learned that for us, the green of God’s creation is life-giving.

Our life in Southern California was comfortable and familiar.  It was home; the place of our birth; the place where we raised our family.  It was a place of rich, long-standing friendships; people that we now miss intensely.  We lived in the center of an entertainment mecca, where there always was something to do.  But it was expensive and crowded…and it was green for only a few months of the year.

Getting established here has kept us busy, so our times away have been few.  Other than an overnight trip here or there, we had not taken a real vacation until we spent a few days camping in the mountains this past summer.  We were about 75 miles from home, and it felt as if we were in a different world.  And after a few days of kayaking, driving through parts of the Cascades, and taking long walks with our dog, we felt completely relaxed and at ease. 

In the past, on the last morning of a trip, I would find myself getting anxious about the return home.  I would be regretting the end of vacation and the return to our frenetic (though fruitful) life.  I would be planning our departure times to try to miss the worst of the LA-area traffic.  I knew that we would be coming home to summer weather that was hot and dry; that we would be driving past hills that were brown; that inevitably – despite my best planning – at some point we would be sitting in bumper-to-bumper traffic on I-5 or I-10 or I-15. 

In other words, coming home after a vacation was a real let-down. 

And all that changed this past summer.  As we packed up the RV and drove back into town, we passed from the green of the Cascades to the green of the Valley.  We traveled from one kind of beauty to another kind of beauty.  We left a place of vacation rest and returned to a home that also is a place of rest.

There simply was no post-vacation letdown. 

This was a transforming experience; another unexpected blessing of our move to this place.  Another reminder that the Heavenly Father knows what is best for each of His children…and He knew this place would be the best for us. 

In this place of beauty, where creation is green and lush, God is allowing us to find some space and to experience life in a whole new way. 

We are busy and productive, and we are at peace…whether away or at home. 

-      Bruce